Maybe time to pack it in

Have had a very frustrating couple of weeks,  had a garage and house fire that we only turned one more than half the department for.  Not sure where the rest of the people were, but we were really short handed for a while.  Than we had a couple of minor calls, again almost no one showed.  The top of the cake so to speak was an activated fire alarm on the lake shore that show only four guys answer.  I drove the tanker alone.  Got just the mini and the tanker out on the call.  Our lack of response to these a long with a four person response on a major accident on the freeway has got me thinking along several lines.  One, we may need to have mutual aid respond to all our calls until we get more available people.  This would be a major change and one I am not sure would be well received by almost no one.  My first responsibility is to the residents, and if that is the only way to insure an adequate response, then that is what we need to do, regardless of the embarrassment it causes us as a department.  I have asked repeatedly for ideas to improve this from my officers and so far have gotten the same number as I have lifetime home runs,  Zero.  At this point it is not feasible to have a paid crew on during the day because of lack of call volume and cost.  Today we had a call and I was about half way between the call and the station.  Went back to the station, and responded with a truck and two other firefighters.  If it had been last week Wednesday, 2/3 of that crew would have not be available.  If it had been ten minutes later today, I would have been first on scene, but we would have had not truck for a while.  Don't know what to do about it.  It is causing a loss of sleep, I am short tempered with people, and have to bite my lip to keep from cutting loose on a few of them.   I came home this evening after having dinner with some high school friends, and made a mental list of what I wouldn't have to do if I quit the fire department.   It would free up three nights a month, no more planning things around meetings.  No more county officer's meeting, which by in large are a waste of time, so much talk so little action.  I would have two nights a week free because I wouldn't be teaching in the academy this fall and winter.  It would give me about three hours on Saturday and a couple of Sunday afternoon to do other things rather than sit and fill out grant applications, insurance review papers, budget planning and where to move money to funds that are over budget, and all sorts of other things that no one ever told me about.   I have reached the point that some of these things are just going to no get done, or on second thought I will hand them to my deputy chief and let him do them, than again if he handles them like he has handled the SOP for vehicle extraction and the station cleaning  assignment, they will never get done.   Right now, I think I should go to bed as my level of burn is slowly raising   Night all.

Can't turn off my mind.

It is 5:30 in the morning, and I am in Marquette, on my way to Houghton County today. My bride is trying to sleep, and I woke up at 4:30AM from a sound sleep with the realization that I have effectively planned 3 things to do, all on the same day next month, three things that cannot be done together.  So, I have spent the last hour lying in bed trying to think of a way to still do all three, and not make major changes to other people's schedules.  Oh well, such is life.   We had training this week, and, would score it as about average.  I have a sense that the equipment checks are becoming, while profitable, also some what shallow.  According to everyone I asked, all equipment was started, and the missing items were noted.  I that area, I think next time, I think we will be missing something of importance, just to see if they catch it.  I do know that a certain few firefighters are putting the effort forth, as one came to me with a list of missing stuff and also a couple items that were not on the sheet, that were on the truck.  We have 8 gas saw, 5 generators, 2 fans, 2 pumps, and a power unit that are to be started and checked each month.  You would think that with that many motors to start the station would be blue with exhaust haze,  well other than the stuff my group started, I only can say for certain that two other items were started.  I sure didn't hear that many motors running.  Yet everyone said they started their equipment.  Also, each group has 6 firefighters in it, well this month my group had 2, for both meetings.  We had 2 show up late for one and not do anything, and 1 show up late for the other and help a little.  Kind of hard, to lay 200' of 3" hose, and operate a hand line by yourself, while the other person makes all the hydrant hook-ups.  But we got it done.  Speaking of training,  this has always been a sore spot with me, as I think we do not train hard enough or long enough.  Have tried various way to change that and have met apathy, quiet resistance, vocal resistance, and in a few cases, open rebellion almost.  Have come to the conclusion, thanks to a fellow EMS director of all people, that this is their (the firefighters problem) not mine.  We have documented evidence that they were all trained to FF2 level, with a couple of exceptions, and those are to FF1 level.  The main reason we have monthly training is to help them maintain their skill levels at an acceptable level, and to pass on new information now available that was not available at the time they tested and passed.  It is also to keep them current on our particular way of doing things.  To help them learn our SOP's and equipment.  It is not to train them in the basic firefighting procedures.  My EMS friend, told me that for his people to keep their job, they need to keep their license.  To do that they need so many CEU's in a given period of time, and in a particular number of fields.  His department offers the needed training to accomplish this, but if they choose to not attend, that's fine, just keep your certifications or goodbye.  I have not just exactly figured out how I will get this point across to the firefighters, but my training office and I are pretty much on the same page.  Our thought is to establish a set of standard benchmarks, and say here they are, you keep your training up to these levels or goodbye.  We as a department will provide training to help you meet these, but if you don't it is your fault not ours.  I think this puts the burden on them to maintain their skill level, not on me.  I think I have for too long felt their failure to preform as expected was my fault, not theirs.  No more.  I can in good conscience say we have provided the training, if you fail, it is your fault.  And if you continue to fail, you will no longer be with us.  Now to figure out a nice way to transfer this to them.  

It has been very hot this week, I think everyone at training wanted to have a water fight, but they got their chance last month.  Judging by the performances on Monday night with ladder for rescue placement training, most have lost more than a step on the their skill level.  The old man and a 3 year firefighter placed an extension ladder and packed up one firefighter and got that firefighter to the top of the ladder before most had gotten their ladder off the rig.   I know it was hot and humid, but we still have fires in that kind of weather.  We have the training trailer coming next month, and I'm working on ways to use it and improve there skill level, but also know that the few faithful will show, some will come once, and most likely some will not come at all.  Did have a interesting thing happen at the Monday drill.  We informed them that they needed to plan on coming in for drivers training competency course for one hour the last weekend of August.  They will be paid for it, but it is required.  Had one firefighter complain loudly in public that this was a bunch of crap and didn't see why they needed to do it.  They took their pager off and slide it across the counter we were sitting at towards me.  I grabbed it and put it on my belt.  They made some comment that they were resigning, and I asked for it in writing and to put it in my mailbox at the station.    About 20 minutes later, as we were about to leave,  this person asked if I was going to give them back their pager,  I said " you want it back?"  I took it off my belt, and held it in my hand,  looked at them and waited for them to respond.  They looked around,  than walked over to me and took it back.  They then left without saying another word.  I just got to love people.

Leadership

The past few days or maybe the last couple of weeks have found me doing some stuff that leaders supposedly don't do.  Yet I find that the really good leaders both in the fire service and outside it are in fact the ones who do these things.  I just go back from the funeral home for a visitation for the mother of one of our firefighters.  Her daughter has been a member of our department for almost three years, and if I do say so myself, our hiring her was won of the smarter things we have done.  Anyway, I would not have know her if she had not joined our department, but because I do now know her, and since I represent the department in so many ways, I felt that both as a friend and also as the chief I needed to take the time and go. Know that at least two other members of the department will stop by, but no sure of the rest.  I think that this is a part of leadership that isn't seen by most people when they think of leaders.  This morning in church, the pastor talked about leadership, in regards to the church.  I looked over his outline last night and we had talked in board meeting about it in regards to a direction that some of us feel the church should talk. So it did not come as any sort of a surprise to me.  But he shared that leaders have a responsibility to do what is best for those who follow.  In the fire service so often I have seen people who strive for leadership, with the sole intent to do things the way THEY want, and not necessarily what is best for the department as a whole.  I had this discussion some time back with a couple of my officers in regard to radio talk groups.  While they wanted one thing, and what they wanted was a good thing, I know that for the most part, it would be beyond the grasp of the many body of firefighters.  I would have  loved to do what they wanted, but reason told me to do what was best for the department as a whole, not what I would have like to see.  Leadership is also I think a position of servant hood.  For some time now, our station has needed a good cleaning.  I have asked my deputy to come up with some kind of a cleaning schedule that involves everyone.  I think I asked him about 18 months ago, and still nothing.  I just let it go, figuring he would get it done, but this weekend finally realized that to him it wasn't a problem.  He had no plans to take care of it, and I think he was hoping, in fact he almost said as much that we needed a fire call, so that Carol, one of our more faithful, caring, and not one to have idol hands, got to the station, and went on standby, so that she would clean the place.  Anyway that hasn't happened, so this weekend, I hired out of my own money, and for other reasons as well, a young lady from our church, who needed the money, and also needed someone to show they cared to clean the station.  She worked two hours on Saturday, never took a break, and got done what I thought would take three hours in two. Already had a couple comments later that day that the station looked a lot better and cleaner.  It was worth the money, in more ways than one.  But still need to remind the deputy that a schedule is needed.  Though I have thought of hiring her for a once a month visit to keep the place looking good.  I think too often some chiefs think it is all about them, when I really should be all about everyone else but you.  I think part of this stems from the fact that we as leaders need to see the biggest possible picture and to see how all of the parts come together.  In the department, and to some degree at church I see that and have that responsibility, in my everyday job, no so much.  But that said, I do try and follow and trust the leadership that is over me.  To me, the key word is trust.   Later this week I have a fire district board meeting and will have the hearing for our suspended firefighter.  Not sure how that will go, but need to get the packets of information to the board members tomorrow so they will have it to look over.  Not looking forward to that at all.  Think I will take my wife out for a flurry tonight.  Besides, I feel the need of a chocolate malt.

Hectic weekend

There are times that things just don't go as planned,  this is one of those weeks, first the paying job has been a challenge, had to work out of town most of the week, so things didn't get done like normal.  I am waiting for product that is needed by customers, some of it needed real soon, but nothing delivered as of Friday.  Hope for certain it comes Monday, or will have a number of unhappy people to deal with. Very important unhappy people. Have my son and grandson here this weekend, found out they were coming at the first of the week, and we had already agreed to have two of my younger grandchildren for the weekend as their parents and older sisters were at a weekend softball tournament.  To top that off, my wife has been not feeling good for a few days and is really tired, so the  added people has helped that situation at all.  We also have a special service at church this week that we have been planning for a number of weeks that involves both of us, but now with one grandchild acting sickly, looks like my wife may miss the whole thing if he gets sick.  Great!!.  She still has a dessert to make for a dinner on Sunday that we are invited to, I think she has to make something for about 60 people, and it looks like all the world that we won't get to it because of all the things going on.  She and I guess really, we didn't needed all of this on this weekend especially, but you feel guilty in telling your children no you can't come, or that it will not be best this weekend.  So you tuff it out and change your plans to accommodate them.  I still have several things to finish for this weekend, but should be able to do it this afternoon,  hope that my wife can at least see the DVD of the special before hand, as my guess is that she won't get to see it tomorrow.  Right now, I think I should stop this post and go mow the lawn or something as I keep getting more angry the more I think about this.   Maybe should change the title to Hell weekend.  Nah,keep it what it is.   When your children at little and at home, your life tends to revolve around them, but I never realized how when they get older and you see them less, that when they choose to involve you, you change your plans for them.   Not sure if we do that because we want to, or from a sense of guilt that maybe you didn't do enough when they were home, so you feel you owe them to makeup for it now.   I find that the thing that will set me off more than anything is when I feel or sense that my wife is suffering or hurting from something or someone.   I think right now, she feels that to be a good grandma, she needs to do what is asked, even if she isn't up to it.  She will tell me no I can't do that, or that it will not work for her right now, and I have learned to sense her physical and mental state before asking her to do something.  But for some people who do not see or talk with her that often, they don't know or sense that, and she is not someone who will tell them no I can't do that.  I have found that it is best if I say no you can't and take the heat for the decision.  So, I think I dropped the ball on this one this time.  Feel like calling it in and saying, they ALL need to go home.  I think one of the things is the fact that our granddaughter has been living with us, and after 7 years of empty nest, having a teenager again his been harder than either of us expected.  Since to my knowledge, only one of my children even know about this blog, and that one lives 12 hours away and has no kids yet, know that they will not see this and won't feel guilty or mad at me for saying it.  Anyway,  FD is going, and that is about all I can say.  My training officer has told me that is interest is waning, think that might be a sign that he wants out of the job.  Time will tell.  They started on the station this week, hopefully will finish by Monday or Tuesday.  The place will then need a good work bee cleaning.  My guess is that the same 4-6 will show up.  Had a fire call the other night, turned out to be a light ballast, but what bothers me more is that only 6 of our firefighters bothered to get out of bed.  Mutual aid rolled three trucks and 9 firefighters.  Our department, one truck, that's it.  At times, I think now after 41 plus years, it maybe time to step back and punt.    Well the lawn awaits,  I hate mowing the lawn almost as much as I hate anything. 

Busy two weeks

Well it has been awhile since I posted and a lot has happened.  Attended the services for my friend, and rejoiced with his family on his home going.  His life was best summed up as one that brought honor and glory to God, one that valued and enjoyed his many friendships, and one that expressed great love for his family.  Mark, I will miss you greatly.  My firefighter has chosen to appeal the action taken in regard to his actions, so we are in a holding pattern until the fire command board meets.  I have a number of things that I need do before the meeting to have all of our ducks in a row so to speak.  We have training this week Monday, and are going to the new housing development to check it out.  I already know that we have an access problem in that what was suppose to be the emergency access, is now a walkway that takes a very hard 90 degree turn and runs right into a fire hydrant.  There is no way you will ever get a truck up that access in an emergency.   There is one way in and that will most likely be blocked with equipment and people trying to get out of the complex if there is ever a fire in it.  By the time our mutual aid aerial will arrive, it will have almost no access to the complex, and certainly have very limited usefulness to us.  I sent them a letter before construction started, and no one listened.  Now I will send a letter, telling them what will happen if they have a fire, and how our ability to cope has been severely restricted.    Had training and truck check last week, a third our my group was missing, so I had the three newest firefighters we have.  Had a good drivers training session, checked all the equipment, did some PR, and got cookies and ice cream.   I really like working with small groups of firefighters more so than larger ones.  Single company size.   The new format is working, though I think some groups are not taking full advantage of the opportunities.  Approached the fire board about giving the old 1980 truck away.  That isn't flying to good, they seem to want to sell it.  I think more because of what they think people will say if they give it away.  Not sure where this will go, but I think if the department that wants it, could pay even a little bit for it, they could get it.  Today was father's day.  My ex-daughter in law and her husband took my wife and I out for dinner on Saturday along with my two oldest grandsons.  Had a nice time,  her husband has adopted my grandson, and has been a great dad to him.  He is also on the fire department with me, and I hope some day becomes one of my officers.  He is very insightful and also very good at looking at a situation and seeing the problems and the solutions.  Got phone calls from 4 of the other 5 today, and the youngest daughter wished my happy fathers day at church this morning.  Wife took me out for dinner and ice cream tonight, so even though I only saw one kid, and that was for all of 30 seconds, did here from them.  Had a nice visit with two of my granddaughters and one grandson also today. On Tuesday of last week had a meeting with the EPA, as they have started to do something about the metal finishing shop that closed  up just down the street from our station, than a meeting in Grand Haven with the board for the WMRFTC. This is the board that guides and oversees the regional fire training center and its programs.  Then headed for GR, and stopped to pickup some parts for the department, and than on to the uniform company to order some.  As I was leaving there, GRFD went by on their way to a multiple alarm church fire.  Had a chance to watch them in action, and learned a few things from them, and also saw they have some of the same challenges that we have.  Learn one thing,  if and when we get an aerial, it will need to be at least 95'.  The 75' that was on the scene of that fire would have been of little value on that size of a building.  Soo, I'm back looking at used Sutphens.   Dinner that evening was with some old high school classmates, the group is getting slowly bigger, not sure I will make it every month, but a few times a year will be good. Busy week, besides fire meeting, have a meeting with FEMA on Wednesday in regard to grant writing, church board meeting on Thursday and an out of town business trip for Tuesday- Thursday.  Still need the day job so to speak.  Also, need to get ready for Sunday, as that will be a very special day.  We are recognizing and honoring a couple of missionaries from our church who 25 years ago suffered a tragic accident that force them off the field.  Their youngest son is my son-in-law, and I have know them both for almost 42 years.  The wife was our baby sitter for our oldest kids, and they are special to both my wife and I.  My daughter is having a family dinner for them, the one married to their son, on Sunday.  She invited us, but I don't feel right going. It is for the families of both of them, and my only connection is that my daughter married into the family.  I feel she is inviting us out of a sense of obligation.   Don't think I go.  Thoughts are with the Munice Fire Department and the DuQuoin Fire Department,  on the lost of their firefighters.  My prayers are for the two widows and the four kids who lost a father so close to fathers day.  For both, some years father's day will fall on the date there husband and father died.  We have found no new ways to kill firefighters.

Promotion of a friend

It has been an eventful few days around here.  Some good, some not so good, and a few tragic.  I received a email this evening, that a friend of mine from my so called day job had passed away this early afternoon.  He had been fighting cancer for a number of years, and had recently taken time away to fight the disease.  I knew he was in a hard fight, and that the odds were not good, but this came very sudden.  Over the 23 years I have known him, we have roomed together more than a few times on business trips.  Our value systems were very much alike, and our conversations ranged from " help find a part for my fire truck, to cows, customers, and many  long and details talks on various spiritual subjects.  He had NO doubt as to were he would be 30 seconds after he passed away,  and took great comfort in knowing that his Saviour had complete control of the problem.  I know that my life here on earth has been greatly enriched with the time we spent together, the conversations we had, and the fun we also had a few times.  He always would refer to himself as the "bald Dutchman".  Today, he was promoted to Glory, and the pain is gone.  May God comfort his wife, daughters and friends.   Will miss you greatly my Friend  

Had the unpleasant duty of meeting with our executive board to bring a charge against one of our firefighters. The board also heard from him as to way the things had happened and why they had progressed to the point of a disciplinary hearing.   After much discussion, reasoning, and compromises, it was decided to suspend him for 6 months, and than have him serve a 6 month probationary period.  This was to be coupled with a loss of seniority in the department.  I need to now pass this on to the Fire District Board for their approval.   Doubt they will change anything, but the final decision really rests with them,  They can modify, lessen or stiffen the action of the executive board.   Not sure a suspension and demotion will help,  I think this persons mind set is what needs to be changed.  But he see no problem with himself, it is those around him that are causing the problem.  

Hopefully we have the problems that we have been having with our Hurst Tools solved.  Moved the power unit to a more accessible place and changes some plumbing to solve the problem.   Also, got a new portable power unit for the tools.  They still haven't worked on the station wall, been almost a month with nothing done, check that nothing started, let alone done.  Have a lot of loose admin ends to tie-up this week before board meeting.  That plus a funeral to attend sometime middle of the week makes the coming next few days rather busy.

Heavy duty

The last two weeks have been a bit heavy around the department,  it would be a long story, but in a nut shell, one of our firefighters has been lying to me and in a sense to the whole department for the last 6 months.  In an effort to help him out, I found out about the lie.  While in the end, no one will lose any money, but the fact he has lied for that long and continued to not come forward with the details has lead to our need to have some form of discipline.  It is not like we have a lot of people clamoring to join us, and this firefighter does a good job on the fireground, it is just his conduct in other matters, both in the department for which I have a responsibility but also in the area of his other jobs and personal life choices.  I really like this guy when he is going right, but of late, like for the last 10 months he has made bad choice after bad choice.   I had this problem a  couple of years ago, and thought then that I would have to suspend him, but he righted the ship for a while.  As I sat in church this morning, we sang a song about the love and justice of God.  Realized that while God loves us, more than anything, he is also just.  I really want this man to be successful, but he also needs discipline. God loves us, but cannot exist with sin, as such man needs a redeemer to take away the penalty of sin.   For my firefighter, I wish there was a way for him to escape the penalty, but I also think that maybe the penalty will wake him up and hopefully bring about a change in behaviour.  Time will tell.  Have not had many calls, had an unusual haz-mat this afternoon,  live ammo on the road, and cars were driving through it and causing it to go off.  Great dispatch scenario,  "Shots fired, send in the fire department."  We swept up about 100 yards of road and collected about 250-300 22 caliber rounds.  Give to the police to dispose of.  Bought my wife a flurry last night, she says that she only has one a year, will we see about that.  She also says I spoil her.   Need to get a few things done for work tomorrow.  Tuesday, I have the party for the 2nd. graders.  Will hand out 13 certificates for pizza, and 14 for ice cream cones. We will also have pizza for lunch.  13 of the 14 students actually held a home fire drill, and all 14 did the home work of making a drawing and show the fire escape plan on paper.   They passed the test so we get the party.   I really look forward to this bunch of kids and they have the greatest teacher.  Will do it again next year, well worth the 4 days of vacation that it takes to do this each year.