Sunday afternoono

Had a great day at church, we have been doing a class on our spiritual gifts, and I thought I know what mine was, well after several different tests and such, have come to the conclusion that none of what I have is that clearly defined,  I didn't score high in anything.  To look at my chart, its almost a flat line, my personality trait is also the same, no dominate character.  My wife says that means I can a lot of different things, I said it is like the utility player on a ball team.  Can do the job until we fine someone better and more gifted.  I said I was like an insurance policy, has got you covered but you hope you never need it.  I don't know why this is bothering me so much, but it is.  With the last couple years of wondering it I had wasted my life on the wrong things, you get to wondering if there is something else you should do.  But the way I read these tests and surveys, I am not really all that good at any one thing, and so I wonder would or could my gifts be used some better way, but with no strong gift or personality it doesn't seem that there would be much use for what I can do, when there is no doubt someone who can do it better.  Spent the afternoon trying to get stuff done for the department, but heart wasn't in it.  Came up with only about a dozen short (30-40 minute) training drills, had hoped I could get at least twice that many.  Have a board meeting this week, not sure what day, Monday, Tuesday or Thursday.  Need to be ready for Monday and hope for Thursday I guess.  Have a list a page long on things that I need to follow-up on with other people, but for the most part I e-mail questions and don't get a response. Only Robin, Carol and Warren seem to get back to me with in a reasonable time,  I know that we all have other lives, and since I have no life as one person put it (no tv, don't fish, hunting, play golf or other sports, just work, FD and church) I have too much time to think and that just isn't what they are all about.  I get that, but still need to get the work that you have said you would do done in a timely manner.  Should have cleaned the officer this afternoon, but didn't.  Did try and organize my week, and that does look pretty good.  Will see how that goes.